Choose to Win Everyday

Why and What is Your Purpose

Have you ever thought your life was a day to day grind? Every Monday you start counting the days until Friday. Perhaps you are not living your life on Purpose. Research shows that only 1 in 4 people have a clear sense of purpose and what makes their lives have meaning. It is almost impossible to lead a rewarding life unless you have some sense of why you are on this earth. I believe in every human there is a passion inside of you.

Which comes first the What or the Why

I believe the why comes before the what. If you would like to start a new business, but the only reason you want to start the business is to make a lot of money; that one why won’t carry you through the tough times. Your bank account will get low, and you will quit, and the business will be something you tried but it didn’t work. Take that same scenario of starting a new business, and you have 25 or a 100 reasons why you want to start the business, when things get tough you will keep going. For instance, one of the reasons you want to start a business is to have more freedom to spend time with your family. You could hire people who have the skills the business needs, but can’t find a job because of their past. The business solves a problem that people need to have peace of mind. The more reasons why you want to do something, the better chance you have of succeeding. If you notice the reasons all involved helping other people, not just yourself

How do I find my What

I believe every person has a desire inside of them to do something that is greater than themselves, and creates value in other people’s lives. It is the reason God put you here. You have to take   time, and ask yourself some questions. For example: what makes me feel alive, what are you really good at doing, if money was not an issue, what would you do. If you take the time to answer these kinds of questions, you will be on your way to finding your purpose.

This is my “Why” for being a Choose to Win Coach.  I grew up in a small West Texas town of Fort Davis and was raised by very well educated, mannered and respected parents. On May 27th, 1988, I graduated from High School and began to be an “independent” person. Little did I know, I was about to head for an up and down ride with the school of hard knocks.

I set a goal to become a Police Officer because in my heart, I was to help people. When I was 20, I got a great call from my first Wife named Kaci. She said that she was pregnant, and I married her in 1990 at the ripe old age of 20. Our Son Tye was born in May of 1991. In 1992 I decided at the age of 22, it was time to join the Sul Ross State University Police Academy.

I graduated from the Police Academy in August of 1992 and was offered a position in San Antonio as a Police Officer. This is the first experience I had about being large and in charge. My badge was bigger than my patrol car, and I lost sight of the true call to serve and protect. As I got more experience, I learned that you reap what you sow. Respect began to be my objective. While all this was going on, I was learning how to consume alcohol and ruin family opportunities at an alarming rate.

In October 1995, I was 25 years old and accepted a position as a D.A.R.E. Officer for the City of Marfa, Texas. At 25 years of age, I was moving back to my roots and hometown during my elementary and junior high days. I became a big drunken idiot on my days off and I was not paying much attention to my family of two boys and my first wife. My priority was drinking and working.

My head was swollen because on my 27th birthday (January 1st by the way) I was promoted to Chief of Police. I got so self-centered and started working 16 hours per day. I was never home and that caused infidelity with my Spouse. We divorced and I lost my family.

In 1999, I left Law Enforcement to pursue more alcohol and wow, I discovered drugs. For the next 15 years, I stayed high and drunk. Got 4 DUI’s. Married another person twice and basically said to heck with living. On my last day of doing drugs, I played Russian Roulette in a dark motel 6 room all alone.

Here come the why. I had to choose to win in life. I went to a homeless shelter after living on the streets and Marge Frost from the East Valley Men’s Center gave me a piece of advice, I will never forget…I will give you a hand up, but not a handout. You must work for your goals if you want to achieve them.

I have an LLC called Phase Won 12 Training Systems. Named for that date. (1-12).

Over the past 7 years, I can say life has become infinitely better than I could have ever dreamed. This is where the I go away and the we come into play.  I learned a formula. It is Jesus + NOTHING = Everything. We got into AA. We earned two college degrees. We got well and we have a vision.

God is my Lord and Savior. We walk together and we talk together, and he has given me the vision for 7 Diamond Training solutions, and Junior’s House Recovery Group LLC. The recovery group is named after my Wife’s Son we lost in 2018 to drugs. I have a goal to lead people to recover from all aspects of addiction and Live in Peace. My Why, is to make Jesus famous again. To lead others to win in all 7 areas of the “Wheel of Life,” and give people a choice to win eternal life and victory thru the principles of the “Sinner’s Prayer.” Good Orderly Direction, Good Orderly Discipline, and Good Orderly Desire. It all spell GOD. What I find weird, is when you spell GOD backwards you get DOG. When a dog speaks, he only says Ruff (Rough). Which is how life is when you choose anything but to win.

A day I will never forget is July 14, 1993.  I was headed to work and in my fabulous, restored, 1991 Karmen Gia.  I remember the sunshine and getting ready to go through a light at an intersection in Memphis, TN.  Next thing I remember was talking to someone and they were fuzzy as I did not have my glasses on. Then the next thing I remember is looking down on someone laying on a bed – they looked familiar as it was me, and then I saw a bright light.  I kept thinking, I have so much to do, I need to go back. 

The next time I woke up, I was in the ICU Unit at the Elvis Presley Trauma Center.  A car had turned left into the intersection, and was blinded by the sunlight shining in his face, and had an offset head-on collision with my vehicle.  I was thrown from the car and suffered major injuries; the police report showed me as critical, not much chance of survival.  A good Samaritan stopped to help and held his jacket against my head as I had a 6” gash in it.  That good Samaritan I truly believe was God.  I have so much to do and God helped me that day to make sure I was able to do the things I needed to do.

I started following Zig Ziglar as a young adult; I always felt like an outsider in my own family, and with my fiery red hair was always picked on and made fun of.  Dale Carnegie, and Zig Ziglar were my mentors, unbeknownst to them, I might add.  In fact, the day of my near fatal car wreck, I had Zig Ziglar’s daily affirmation card in my purse, which I was reunited with after I left the Trauma Center.

9,130 days, or 26 years, later from my near fatal car wreck I was able to get up off the floor without any help, or crawling over to an object to pull myself up.  I started in a wheelchair being wheeled out of the hospital and had to be lifted in to my friend’s car. But I didn’t stay in the wheelchair long, as we had to go by the junkyard to get my keys out of my wrecked car so I could get in my apartment.  I walked, yes walked, over to the gate and walked over to my car – kept walking every day after that.  While I was listed on the police report as near death, I had no major injuries, no broken bones.   Had to scoot up the stairs on my butt, overcame that.  Could not walk down stairs without holding on to the hand rail, could not run, could not do much of anything I could do before the wreck. 

God had a plan as he was holding me in his arms that fateful day 28 years ago, because I have so much to do; Zig Ziglar had a plan for me too – keep that mindset clear and positive, as much as possible, because the obstacles to overcome were huge, and yet attainable, even though it would take many, many years.  His books, CDs, and seminars were the things I spent money on, even forgoing food to afford them.  I also got to meet Zig for the first time at a Born To Win Seminar – I felt like I had known him my whole life, which I basically did, and when I got to shake his hand and he looked in my eyes, he said nice to see you again, my child.  Zig knew I had things to get done too.

The doctors told me I would be in a wheelchair and I’m not; the doctors told me I would not have the same life as I had before the car wreck, and I don’t.  I have a better, more inspiring, creative, difficult at times, most amazing at times, perfect, and not-so perfect, life.  I Choose To Win Everyday of my life.  I am also very honored to represent Zig Ziglar in my coaching and to work alongside his son Tom Ziglar, maybe I should call him brother, on my journey.  I have so much to do, and God helped me go do it, and the life long dream to be a Ziglar coach is an amazing feeling, that I feel Zig had planned for me. 

I have been blessed with the best and the worst jobs in my life, which have all shaped me for a time like this. A time to Choose To Win and to choose to help others Choose To Win as well.